Happy Mother’s Day…Lessons From The Second Time Around. I remember my first Mother’s Day in 2000 with the twins, when I was in a stupor of sleeplessness and stumbling with anxiety over doing everything right. But there was a constant sense of awe and joy that I was allowed to bring these two souls into the world. In the ensuing 15 years, I’ve learned a lot about what I have control over and what I don’t. What I wasted time on worrying about when I should have been focusing on more pressing issues. And I learned that it was perfectly all right to let the rest of the house go to H-E-double hockeysticks while I rocked my babies.
Zoe was an unexpected gift–we’d never planned on adopting or having more children. (Editor’s note: there’s a phrase called “stoppage” that a subgroup of mothers here will understand.) We had a full 10 days notice that we were adding to the family. I had the gift of watching our tiny little Baby Mama safely deliver Zoe into this world. Because I was knocked out with heart issues with the twins, Zoe is literally the first birth of one of my kids I was around to see. I have an entirely new respect for the courage and strength of women–the cluster of nurses and relatives who cheered this little girl on, held her legs, dabbed her forehead. And when Zoe was born, we all cried with her.
(Photo credit: Kim+5)
But there’s so many women I love who never had the chance to carry a child, to raise them and hear the word “Mama!” over and over. Every one of us with ovaries should still carry the title of Mom–we all support each other, watch over the Littles, love a child who won’t even call you “Stepmom.” The sheer primal strength of women rotates the planet, brings these children into adulthood, and with tears in our eyes, holds the hands of one who starts the cycle all over again.
(Photo credit: Shobeir Ansari)
I love you all. I am grateful for every good wish, for every prayer, for every baby blanket, for every bit of advice that rains on my children in an endless shower of blessings. For every woman who reads this, please know that without you, this generation of Littles wouldn’t be here.
We are all Mothers.
Happy Mother’s Day, my friends.